What advice would you give to your teenage self?
You were troubled when you decided that science was incompatible with God. You were young, and your family had become a mess because of an addict member and the whole addictive system (addict, enabler, the responsible child, the wild child, the absent child …). So you did not know you could and should ask for help.
If that trouble comes on you again, you now know not to make a hasty decision like being an atheist until you’ve asked for help. Keep on asking! Ask the God you don’t believe in!
There is a God, and he’ll lead you to where you can find him.
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